Flat out

Apart from the obvious drawbacks, like the safety aspect, changing a flat means broken nails, perspiration ruining your make-up and dirt on your hands and clothes. And there’s the other factor: do you even have a spare tyre in your boot?

A recent survey by tyre company Goodyear showed that four out of five South Africans are more worried about getting a puncture than running out of petrol on our roads. I would imagine that this strikes a chord with most women: how many of us are capable of rolling up our sleeves, whipping out the spare, and doing a swift wheel-change? Not to mention the fear of being stranded, alone, on the side of the road.

One pundit told me that the expected rate of punctures per person is one in a lifetime or something equally remote. Even so, Sod’s Law means that that one that will happen in a desolate area where there’s no cellphone signal and the nearest town an hour’s drive behind you.

But, thanks to giant leaps in technology, there are space-age type solutions at hand. One of these is an amazing new invention called runflat tyres, standard these days on some cars, notably certain BMWs. Produced by most of the leading tyre manufacturers, these allow you to keep driving for about 150km – at a speed not exceeding about 80km/h – after the puncture, allowing you a reasonable travelling distance to make it home or to the nearest garage.

They’re hellishly, horribly expensive, of course, but a viable option if you’re that worried about the possibility of a puncture. Of course, you still have to factor in the price of a complete replacement – you aren’t supposed to repair these, so you’ll need to buy another one. Which means the cash registers keep ringing.

And remember, if your car is fitted with runflats, it doesn’t carry a spare in the boot. So if the incident that caused the puncture also completely ruined your rim, you have no way of reaching your destination. Which means they’re not ideal for those of us who like to go out into the wilds or travel the jungle that is Jozi late at night, but just the thing if the thought of changing a tyre is enough to send you to the spa for the day – and you’re not likely to be driving anywhere further than the mall.

Experts warn that because you don’t necessarily know that you have a puncture when it happens (because runflat tyres are so good) these tyres should be used only in conjunction with an onboard tyre-pressure monitoring system which not all cars have.

What are your priorities?

Limited boot space? How about a ‘Marie Biscuit’ then? A number of manufacturers are fitting these tyres now instead of full-sized spares. You have a puncture, open your boot, shift your parcels to haul out the spare and there’s this skinny little thing resting in the well. At least it’ll get you home or to the garage. The ‘Marie Biscuit’ is not recommended for travel further than about 80km (tough if you’re miles into the Kalahari). Then you still have to repair your flat and, if it’s damaged beyond repair, you have to invest in another full-sized tyre. It does free up more boot space for shopping bags though.

Inflate your flat

The latest (rather bizarre) spare tyre idea is the can of foam and compressed air.

Yup – open the boot, look for the spare, and all you’ll find is a naked-looking can with a weird piece of tubing which is meant to inflate your tyre and get you to the garage. But then you knew what you were getting when you bought this car, didn’t you? Motorcyclists have been using these in emergencies for decades – a canister of the foam will fill your tyre in minutes and you can be back on the road and on your way in less time than it takes to touch up your lipstick. ‘No one, particularly women, should drive without a can of the stuff in their boot. Any auto accessory or motorcycle shop will stock

it, so next time you’re passing, pop in and invest in one.

The bottom line

As far as I’m concerned, I’d rather lose the electric windows than not have a full-sized spare tucked away safely in my boot. Yes, a sunglasses holder is a nice touch in the car, as is the drawer under the front seat, radio-tuning on the steering wheel, cooled glove box for the Coke Lite and heated seats (if you live in Siberia or Alaska). But, despite the obvious advances in technology, these things are of no use if you’re stuck in the middle of nowhere without a full-sized, healthy looking spare tyre in your boot.